INTEGRITY

Operating with the Truth

When you state the truth, you succeed.



For example, if you exaggerate a customer’s problem to increase your income, you run into problems. The customer can sense the lie, no matter how sincere you act. If you are caught, the penalties are painful.



If you understate the customer’s problem or your fees, you are selling out what you know to be true. You prevent your customer from making the proper decisions. You feel like a wimp.



You must look the customer in the eye, without hesitation, and deal with the truth. The customer can then act accordingly. You did your job even if the person doesn’t like the truth.



When you have the courage to call the truth the truth you become a more powerful force. It is easy to hold a position on an honest fact.



For example, your software adds numbers incorrectly. You call the software technician who looks it over. He says, "the problem is the user; the software is fine." You pull out a calculator and prove the computer’s answer is wrong.



Because you know the truth, you refuse to agree with the technician. No matter how smart the expert is, or how inexperienced the user is, you KNOW the figures do not add up. You have personal integrity.



The same idea applies to your family, spouse and friends. You agree or disagree based on what you know to be true, not on what they want you to believe.



Integrity



Integrity means you stick to your personal code of conduct. You stick to what you decide is right and wrong.



When you live with integrity, you succeed. You are open and honest. Your life is uncomplicated and less stressful.



When you have good integrity you have no reason to lie. You can look at yourself in the mirror. You have nothing to hide.



The Best Code of Conduct for You



So what is right and ethical for you? How do you work out your own code of conduct?



"WHAT IS TRUE FOR YOU is what you have observed yourself



"And when you lose that you have lost everything."



"What is personal integrity?



"Personal integrity is knowing what you know—



"What you know is what you know—



"And to have the courage to know and say what you have observed.



"And that is integrity



"And there is no other integrity." — L. Ron Hubbard



No one needs to tell you what is right or wrong. You can see and decide for yourself.



For example, Dave may decide it is perfectly fine to drink wine with dinner. Steve may observe the same issue and decide it is wrong to drink wine. Both individuals made their own decisions. Both are operating with integrity.



Maggie may decide spending money on vacations is a crime while Lisa may decide skipping a vacation is a crime. Both make their own decisions about what is right and wrong.



Like most people, you have probably decided it is wrong to not support your family, abandon a friend, steal from your company, cheat on your marriage, shoplift, abuse drugs and so on.



You probably believe it is good to work hard, be kind to your parents, have fun, pay your bills, tell the truth, return things you borrow and so on.



You know the truth when you see it. You know you are using integrity when you look in a mirror.



When you deceive your partner, you both lose a little. If you lie to your spouse, you lose a little. Whenever you abandon what you know to be true, you lose.



Nothing makes you more miserable than "selling out" and failing to stick to your integrity.



10 Benefits of Living with Integrity



1. When you stick to what you know is right or wrong, you don’t regret anything you have done.



2. People follow your example and act more honestly.



3. Your powers of observation are more accurate. You can see the truth about others more easily.



4. No need to keep your stories straight as your stories are facts. Less mental work is required.



5. You handle rejection and criticism more easily. For example, you are not bothered if someone says, "You charge too much!" As you have no doubt that your fees are fair, you know the other person has the problem.



6. You have fewer personality conflicts with others even when you are aggressive.



7. You fight crimes against you with more ferocity when you have nothing to hide.



8. When you make a mistake, it is easy to accept responsibility and move forward.



9. You earn the reputation as a person with integrity. For example, employees brag about honest bosses. "He might be more honest about your work than you might want to hear, but he’s fair and doesn’t lie."



10. Your odds of being sued, fined or convicted of a crime go way down

HOW TO HANDLE DIFFICULT PEOPLE

A bully at your work is difficult for you to face. He is demanding you do part of his job without pay or credit. How do you handle it?
Your neighbors are constantly fighting. They wake you up in the middle of the night with their screams and curses. What do you say to them?
Your father is unhappy about your career choice. He constantly criticizes your work and points out what he thinks you should do. How do you deal with him?
Difficult situations are part of everyone’s life. Employers and employees can’t get along. Partners clash over money. Spouses cannot resolve disagreements.
If you ignore these situations, they always get worse. Employees get fired, partnerships and marriages break up, everyone is miserable.
Waiting and worrying, the most common "solution," also allows the problem to get worse while giving you stress and shortening your life span.
If you attack the person, at least you are trying to fix the problem. But attacks, rage or irrational anger gives you a bad name, makes people afraid of you and reduces honest communication.
Disconnecting from the problem or from the person is not always wise or practical. Losing employees, supporters and friends because you needlessly disassociate from them may reduce your stress, but you might also become lonely and poor.
The Best Solution Is to Confront and Handle People
"The ability to stand up to and confront and handle whatever comes the way of the organization depends utterly on the ability of the individuals of the organization to stand up to, confront and handle what comes the individual's way." — L. Ron Hubbard
When you face and resolve the problem yourself, you feel wonderful. You are in control of your life. You not only conquer the opposition, you conquer your fear. Few accomplishments are more satisfying than confronting someone who is difficult to face and handling the conflict.
How to Confront and Handle Someone
By getting organized and working out a plan of action, confronting and handling people becomes much easier. The key is your preparation.
"THE SUCCESS OF ANY EVENT IS DIRECTLY PROPORTIONAL TO THE TIMELY PREPARATION." — L. Ron Hubbard
Follow these seven steps to prepare yourself for dealing with the difficult people in your life.
1. Make the decision to face up to the person directly and by yourself.
2. Write down the exact problem you need to handle and your goal for the confrontation.
Examples of problems to be confronted that you might write down:
"Joe is refusing to pay me despite our agreement."
"Chris is hurting office morale and causing me stress with her continual complaining."
"Bob is supposedly telling people that my work is inferior and I am dishonest."
Once you specifically name or identify the problem, write down a goal for the meeting. "By the end of the meeting, I want . . . ."
Examples of goals or objectives you might want as a result of a confrontation:
"Joe pays me in full."
"Chris stops complaining or leaves."
"Learn the truth about Bob’s comments and if true, get him to stop it."
In some cases, your objective may also state:
"Figure out if I want this person as a partner/employee/boss/friend."
3. Write down a Plan or List of Points You Need to Make to Support Your Goal: Facts, Reasons and explanations you may need the other person to understand. List the points in order of priority or importance.
For example, to get Joe to understand why he must pay you, you might make these points:
A. Joe requested the service.
B. Joe signed an agreement to pay for the service.
C. We provided the service as promised.
D. Joe was happy with the service.
E. Etc.
4. Write down objections, reactions or disagreements the other person may have. Include everything you are afraid might happen during the meeting. Putting specific concerns and fears in writing reduces their impact on you.
For each objection, reaction or disagreement you expect will happen, write a solution of how you will deal with each.
5. Organize your notes and gather supportive documents.
6. Arrange the meeting where you will not be disturbed, preferably in a space you control.
7. Start the meeting.
A. Look the person directly in the eye.
B. Explain the specific problem you want to resolve as you noted in Step 2.
C. Go over your first point on the list from Step 3.
D. Listen carefully to the other person and make certain they feel understood.
E. Hold a position on your points.
F. Use your solutions to their reactions as you worked out in Step 4.
G. Continue describing your points and listening to the person's side.
H. Do not give up. Communicate and persist for as long as it takes to reach your goal.
The more frequently you confront and handle difficult people, the easier it becomes. The amount of time it takes to prepare for a confrontation decreases. You become strong and tough.
When you confront and handle everyone around you, people respect you for your courage, your honesty and your control. Your associates, employees or coworkers follow your example and become more productive. Your enemies either become harmless or become friends.
Taking positive organized action, despite fear, is the kind of courage all successful people must have to succeed.

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